Extended periods of quiet reflection, centering down, paying attention to what's going on in the heart, meditiating on what's most excellent, what gives hope, what has the ability to touch my hurt, my longing, my confusion... Stopping to consider such things, I find, can go a long way in determinig the trajectory of my life.
HOWEVER....
Life is distracting. Especially in today's day and age... I have so much around me that demands my attention and it's funny how easily I give my attention so willingly. I am guilty of spending hours looking at the meaningless and boring status updates of people on Facebook, some I hardly know... or as I log in to check email how many times I do I venture off and read goofy news headlines and spend 30 additional minutes on the computer than I had originally planned to. I'm not trying to knock Facebook or email. I love these avenues for connecting and even meeting new people but for me they can be a source of major distraction to my spending time on more noble and important pursuits and I sometimes find I am miserably out of balance.
I recently taught a 2 week series in our church adult catalyst class on slowing down for the purpose of silence and solitude. As an introvert, I am naturally drawn to being alone to enjoy reflection and contemplation as my spiritual pathway to God. For most I know the idea of solitude for the purpose of meditiation and quieting down can be overwhelming and foreign. (to me that's so mind boggling... who wouldn't want to spend 3 hours alone to think and just be???? ahhh... I salivate just thinking about it). In the same breath I admit, that due to busyness, I don't do it often enough. I was challenged as I prepared for this class... I poured over different resources and found that getting quiet to allow for time and space to reflect is a key way for christians to grow in their faith and character and can even determine the future trajectory of life itself.
I like Romans 12:1.... "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind... then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is... his good perfect and pleasing will." I read about the desert fathers in some of the resources I looked over and they were convinced that if one took the call to be transformed seriously that solitude was a must. They said... "Solitude is the furnace in which transformation takes place". So according to this verse and the wisdom of the desert fathers we need to be renewed in our thinking in order to be transformed and the conduit of being transformed is solitude.
I was further challenged by thoughts I have already shared regarding distraction. I read in one resource called "The Way of the Heart" by Henry Nowen... " We move through life in a very distracted way... never taking the time to wonder if what we do, think and say are worth it."
The Bible talks about us taking off the old and putting on the new. I believe that the new self is the true self, the person God sees us as... the false self is what we naturally default to when we move through life in a distracted way, never taking time to think if what we do, think and say are worth it... Henry Nowen went on to say..."Our false self is fabricated by social compulsions... we spend a lot of time fearing for our identity. We all live this way... depending on the responses of others, needing ongoing and increasing affirmation. What matters to us most is how we are perceieved by the world. If busyness is good, I must look busy. If having money is a sign of real freedom I must claim more... If knowing people proves I'm important, then I must make more contacts. It's our continual lurking fear of failure that tends to drive everthing we do. Without solitude we remain victims of our society and continue to be entangled in the illusions of the false self... going with the flow without thoughts of what it means to take off the old and put on the new."
It seems again that to prevent us from becoming entangeld too deeply in the illusions of the false self, solitude might help.... What is solitude? Why would anyone seek solitude? Most define it as a time and place for ourselves, privacy, recharging, restoring, a place where we gather new strength to keep competing in life according to the false self... However, I was challenged to think it more a place of conversion where we have a chance to let go of the false self that chases after compulsion and instead emerge from solitude with new perspective... discovering our true selves, the self that resembles what God sees and created us to be. A place of surrender and letting go of the continual struggle to live up to the demands of the false self and instead to rest in truth that says I am loved and valued no matter what.
Of course, surrendering and discovery are a process... sometimes a long process, that I am convinced simply begins with a decision to say yes to being open to the possibilities that would come into a life characterized by silent awareness to our inner world... the longings, the fears and the wonder of the heart... a process that would lead us to discover new directions, goals, perspecitves and dreams that more closely line up with the way God designed us to experience life.
In my consideration to include solitude more regularly I plan to use the following questions to help guide my thoughts... (from Phillip Yancey's book... "Prayer")
1. How can I slow down?
2. How can I simplify things?
3. How can I bring silence into my life?
4. How can I savor this moment?
5. How can I speak up? (tell the truth)
6. How can I settle in? (establish roots and rituals)
7. How can I shed my armor and masks?
8. How can I serve the community?
Asking and answering these questions for the purpose of centering down I pray help bring me closer to God who is already near! Nothing better than knowing and being fully assured God is already present in our lives... and all around us... Solitude offers us the chance to attend and respond to that presence for the purpose of deep transformation, renewed perspective and maybe even a new direction altogether!!!
